How to Help Kids Cope with the Emotional Fallout of Divorce

By Brenda Tillman 

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Divorce is never easy, but it can be especially hard on kids. Fortunately, there are things that parents can do to help their children cope with the divorce. Parents can help their kids get through this difficult time by following these tips.

Talk to your children.

Talk to your children

Talking to kids about what is going on during the divorce process can be hard. But talking openly and honestly with them about the situation can help ease their fears and anxieties. It’s important not to try and shelter kids from what is going on. That will only lead to more questions and confusion down the line and could even lead to a child feeling that what is going on with the divorce is their fault. 

It’s a good idea to include your children in discussions about financial and living arrangements during the divorce process. This can also help ease any anxiety they may have, especially when it comes time to make some of those changes. You should stress to your children that just because the divorce is happening, it doesn’t mean that you don’t love each other anymore.

Make sure they understand that they are not responsible for the divorce.

Parents mustn’t try to turn their kids against the other parent. While it can be tempting to have your children take your side when it comes to the divorce, this can lead to them feeling like they have to choose sides in future years.

It may even lead to them having problems with relationships in the future. Parents need to remember that they are role models for how to treat others in relationships.

Your kids must understand the decision to divorce is not a reflection on them. Parents should also make sure their children know that they can still have a good relationship with both parents.

Put them first in your life.

Parents need to keep their kids as a top priority, even after the divorce. Parents should make sure they continue to spend time with their children and talk about what is going on in their lives.

While it may be difficult, parents need to try and put their kids first during the divorce process. Parents need to make sure kids get enough attention from them, especially if they are going through many physical or emotional issues. It’s essential to make sure they are eating right, getting enough sleep, and attending school regularly.

It’s important for parents not to try and punish the other parent by making it difficult for them financially, not allowing them to see the kids, or trying to make the kids reject them. Doing this will only cause more problems when it comes time to finalize the divorce. Kids need both parents in their lives, whether they are together or not.

Encourage them to keep up with their regular routines and activities.

For kids to stay strong during the divorce, they must keep their regular schedules and activities.

It’s also a good idea not to change the kids’ schools. Parents can help ensure they stay strong and healthy emotionally by keeping them in their everyday routines.

Kids should continue to do things like eat meals at the same time each day, get enough sleep, and attend school every day.

Keeping kids busy with their normal activities can make them feel more secure and safe, even when everything is changing.

Offer emotional support.

Offer emotional support

How do you help kids cope with divorce? It’s important to let your children know they can talk to you about what is going on in their lives. By giving them this support, parents let kids know they are not alone in the process.

If kids are angry, upset, or confused about what is going on during the divorce, it’s important for parents not to get angry or upset themselves. Instead, they should try and understand why their kids are feeling this way and offer emotional support and guidance through the process.

Try to find positive ways for them to express themselves. If your child is acting out or having problems at school, parents should consider enrolling them in a creative outlet such as art, music, or sports. Getting kids involved in activities can help them relax and focus on other things besides the divorce.

Be consistent with discipline.

Parents need to set rules and consequences when kids live with them, not just during the divorce process. Kids should know they can’t break the rules simply because their parents split up.

Parents need to make sure kids follow the same rules and discipline guidelines they have been following all along. As a result, kids will still feel as though their parents are in control and that they can depend on them.

Don’t fight in front of the kids.

When kids are in the middle of a divorce, parents need to stay calm and don’t fight in front of the kids. When parents argue and fight, kids may think it’s their fault, which can cause emotional issues.

Parents need to keep the kids out of the middle of their fight and make sure they don’t argue or speak badly about the other parent in front of them.

If parents are fighting, they must find a place to talk where kids can’t hear them. Keeping the kids out of the middle is vital for their emotional well-being throughout the divorce process.

When parents are fighting, they must keep their voices down to avoid upsetting or scaring their kids. Parents should also avoid using the kids as messengers between them, calling each other, or sending emails back and forth that include their kids.

These actions can confuse and upset kids and make them feel like they are not safe at home. Kids should always depend on their parents to be there for them.

Give them plenty of love and support.

Parents should give kids as much love and support as possible during the divorce process. This can greatly help with coping, even when times get tough.

Talk to other parents, counselors, teachers, and other people your kids are close to. These people can offer support and advice on how best to work with your kids during the divorce.

The most important thing parents can do when helping kids cope with divorce is to let kids know they are loved and give them the support they need. This can be a complicated process for both parents and children, but doing all you can to help kids through it will pay off in the long run.

Set rules and limits that are fair for both parents.

Set rules and limits that are fair for both parents

It’s essential for kids to feel like their parents control the divorce. Setting limits and rules that are fair for both parents can help kids feel less scared and more secure.

For example, parents can promise to treat the kids fairly regarding time with them or money spent on them. Kids are usually afraid that one parent will get more of their time or more money, leading to jealousy and feelings of unfairness.

Parents shouldn’t bring up the divorce when kids are with the other parent. When kids are with the non-custodial parent, it’s important for the other parent not to bring up their own issues with the divorce.

Divorce is a complex process for everyone involved, including the non-custodial parent. When kids are with that parent, they should entirely focus on spending time with them and having fun.

It’s not a good idea to bring up the divorce or how difficult it is when kids are with their other parent. Doing this will only upset the other parent and take away from the time they get to spend with their kids.

Easing into visitation can be extremely helpful for kids.

It can be challenging to maintain a set schedule for visitation with the kids during the divorce process. When parents switch back and forth between living with one parent to the other, maintaining a set schedule can be almost impossible.

When kids are switching back and forth between parents, it’s a good idea to ease them into the visitation process. For example, parents can start by setting a short visit for the first few times. Eventually, the parents can work towards a longer visitation time.

It’s essential for kids to feel ready and comfortable with any changes to the visitation schedule. Parents shouldn’t force kids to switch from one parent’s home to the other, which can lead to a lot of confusion and upset.

Instead, parents should ease their kids into the new schedule. This will go a long way towards helping kids adjust to the divorce process.

Conclusion.

Divorce is never easy for kids, but parents mustn’t take it out on them. When parents are calm and supportive throughout the divorce process, their kids are more likely to adjust to the changes.

If parents don’t fight in front of the kids, keep them out of the middle, and ease them into changes in visitation time, then their kids are more likely to remain emotionally healthy throughout the divorce process.

Please leave your questions and comments about this article below.

Thanks for reading!!!

Author

  • Brenda Tillman is a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Practitioner, a dedicated mom blogger, and a life enthusiast. She also has completed courses on Parenting Skills, Learning, and Education. She is married and is the proud mother of a boy and two girls. She loves being with her family and pets. She has been blogging for over five years now and enjoys sharing her thoughts on parenting, relationships, health & fitness as well as other topics that come up in life.

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